Sunday, November 23, 2008
The Kinitawowi & Bally Show, episode 27
K: I finally figured out what was wrong with my computer!
B: What was it?
K: It was the CPU. I replaced it with an old one, and it worked.
B: Is this a long-term solution?
K: Not really, but it'll keep me in porn and House until I can get an upgrade.
*Recorded at B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 1/9/08*
---
K: The greatest curse of modern society: the belch with a bit of sick in it.
*Recorded at B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 1/9/08*
---
*K is flicking through the Sky Channels and finds the Futurama episode Spanish Fry*
K: If memory serves, you don't think much of that one.
B: No, but if there's nothing else on...
K: Well, all the porn on the Internet won't download itself. Plus I want a coffee.
*B laughs*
K: *sings* The Internet is really really great... FOR COFFEE!
*Recorded at B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 25/9/08*
---
*K's cousin has given birth to a boy named John David Robinson*
K: I'll put money on the fact that the David is because of me.
*B winks*
B: You're in there!
K: She's my cousin! And she's not from Norfolk!
*Recorded at B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 29/9/08*
---
*K&B are watching Chuck - Chuck is on a date with Sarah*
B: See, this is what happens when you have writers. If I had writers, I would be getting laid left, right and centre.
*pause*
B: <*whispers manically*> I can dream!
*pause*
K: See, what you really need is a CIA database in your head.
*pause*
K: It's an icebreaker.
*Recorded at B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 30/9/08*
---
*following a discussion on the topic in the pub*
K: Where do you see yourself in four or five years' time?
B: Drunk, ditch, six pack of salt and vinegar.
*Recorded in Hartshill, Stoke-on-Trent, 16/10/08*
---
*B spots a job advert on Facebook*
B: Senior Linux engineers, eh?
K: I know nothing about Linux, except that it's as mad as a box of frogs, carrying a box of frogs.
*Recorded in B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 21/10/08*
---
K: I have ethical objections to Sk8er Boi.
*Recorded in B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 30/10/08*
---
K: I can't think of a more tragic invention than the single sandwich toaster.
*Recorded in Hartshill, Stoke-on-Trent, 12/11/08*
B: What was it?
K: It was the CPU. I replaced it with an old one, and it worked.
B: Is this a long-term solution?
K: Not really, but it'll keep me in porn and House until I can get an upgrade.
*Recorded at B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 1/9/08*
K: The greatest curse of modern society: the belch with a bit of sick in it.
*Recorded at B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 1/9/08*
*K is flicking through the Sky Channels and finds the Futurama episode Spanish Fry*
K: If memory serves, you don't think much of that one.
B: No, but if there's nothing else on...
K: Well, all the porn on the Internet won't download itself. Plus I want a coffee.
*B laughs*
K: *sings* The Internet is really really great... FOR COFFEE!
*Recorded at B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 25/9/08*
*K's cousin has given birth to a boy named John David Robinson*
K: I'll put money on the fact that the David is because of me.
*B winks*
B: You're in there!
K: She's my cousin! And she's not from Norfolk!
*Recorded at B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 29/9/08*
*K&B are watching Chuck - Chuck is on a date with Sarah*
B: See, this is what happens when you have writers. If I had writers, I would be getting laid left, right and centre.
*pause*
B: <*whispers manically*> I can dream!
*pause*
K: See, what you really need is a CIA database in your head.
*pause*
K: It's an icebreaker.
*Recorded at B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 30/9/08*
*following a discussion on the topic in the pub*
K: Where do you see yourself in four or five years' time?
B: Drunk, ditch, six pack of salt and vinegar.
*Recorded in Hartshill, Stoke-on-Trent, 16/10/08*
*B spots a job advert on Facebook*
B: Senior Linux engineers, eh?
K: I know nothing about Linux, except that it's as mad as a box of frogs, carrying a box of frogs.
*Recorded in B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 21/10/08*
K: I have ethical objections to Sk8er Boi.
*Recorded in B's house, Stoke-on-Trent, 30/10/08*
K: I can't think of a more tragic invention than the single sandwich toaster.
*Recorded in Hartshill, Stoke-on-Trent, 12/11/08*
California Party October 25th-27th 2008
*While walking on the beach*
Tannoy announcer: Please stay off the lifeguard tower!
Caz: Is he talking to the seagull?
-------
[We're discussing the identity of the mystery guest due to arrive at Cassy's party]
Mr Soupy: What if it's a Republican?
BigEvil: As long as I can take him, it doesn't matter.
-------
oslowe: I heard the other day that Jason Vorhees is basically a giant cock-blocker.
-------
Soupytwist: [on being asked what's in her drink] About four different kinds of alcohol and milk. It tastes like candy!
-------
*oslowe is trying to explain a character in Naruto and not getting much back*
Mr Soupy: [apologetically] I'm sorry, I was thinking about math.
-------
*We're talking about films*
Mr Soupy: [to Soupytwist] What was the unwatchable crap you watched last night?
-------
MdmeAlbertine: Chinese Democracy [The Guns N Roses album] is like Bigfoot.
-------
*On the joy of siblings*
oslowe: One time when I was four and my sister was one, my mom was crying and I said to her, "Couldn't we just put her in the trash can?"
-------
CassyLee: Sammy, please may I have a potato chip?
*Sam passes one over*
CassyLee: See, I don't mind training a two-year-old to be my waiter.
-------
BigEvil: [noticing Sam] He has no pants.
mouse: I often get that problem myself.
-------
*We're discussing mouse's son's unusually large feet*
mouse: I told him he was going to have a lucky wife someday, but that was when he was taking the trash out.
-------
mouse: [on what her son said to her before they went to DragonCon] "And what are we not going to say to Alan Tudyk when we meet him? That you want his seed."
-------
BigEvil: I'm smelling of patchouli as we speak.
bettie: Fucking hippy. Or lesbian. I'm not quite sure.
-------
*We're talking about food and bettie is correcting BigEvil regarding ingredients in tahini*
Mr Soupy: We need a new website based on that conversation. "Ask Annika."
BigEvil: Iknowbetterthanyou.com.
-------
Mr Soupy: [after waiting for Sam to sit up so he can give him a drink] You can't get drunk laying down!
-------
*BigEvil has been sharing his drink around*
BigEvil: Last time I checked my cooties count was really low.
Callie: And you tell us after we drink?
-------
*bettie is showing Caz how to block in knitting*
BigEvil: How do you feel about blocking? If it's cock, I don't like it.
-------
*BigEvil has been relating how his normal dress gained the envy of a whole load of guys in pirate fancy dress*
BigEvil: I'm not a pirate!
Caz: No, you arrrrrrrrr!
-------
*MdmeAlbertine has just raced across the carpet after Sam on her hands and knees*
BigEvil: I haven't seen anyone move that fast on all fours for a while.
-------
*BigEvil is talking about how only the pretty people are in the circle created by CassyLee's house*
bettie: Where are the ugly people?
BigEvil: In that mythical world on the other side of the balcony.
mouse: Arkansas?
-------
MenleyNin: I write about poo way more than anyone without a child should.
bettie: I don't write about poo and I change diapers on a daily basis!
-------
Soupytwist: I'm really sad that I haven't met Simon yet.
CosmicAvatar and Caz: [simultaneously] Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!
(Heehee, little did we all know!)
-------
mouse: Y'see, now I'm picturing Alan Tudyk. You shouldn't do that.
-------
oslowe: Dude, you're too big for me.
BigEvil: You have the quickness advantage.
CosmicAvatar: I came in late to this conversation, didn't I?
-------
*We are looking over CassyLee's power ballad CD*
Mr Soupy: Whitesnake makes you think of "Great White".
BigEvil: It actually makes me think of hot chicks on cars.
-------
bettie: Those were pretty much all the bands I was listening to while in labour.
BigEvil: Willingly?
-------
mouse: I have to have this Advil ring for allergies.
BigEvil: I have one of those for when I go to nightclubs. "Advil only".
Mr Soupy: Advil and a pink cup.
-------
bettie: Where's Cassy? Drunk and passed out?
-------
Soupytwist: [On Mr Soupy] He can sew so well it's not funny.
BigEvil: I'll just stick to playing guitar really crappily.
Mr Soupy: Oh, I can do that too.
-------
*On the fact that Alyson Hannigan's pregnant*
bettie: Willow's having Wesley's baby!
All: EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!
BigEvil: Oh, yeah, this is a Buffy party!
-------
Caz: [on being mistaken for Sam's mother] Do you think my arse is that fat? Do you think I've had kids?
bettie: Hey!
-------
mouse: Well, you see a man and a woman playing with a child, you're bound to jump to conclusions.
Mr Soupy: [sotto voce to Caz] Also, Americans are stupid.
-------
Soupytwist: I'm built for farming and breeding.
-------
*starshine is talking to Sam while the latter is being breast-fed*
bettie: He's saying, "That's nice. This is my boob."
starshine: That's OK, honey, I don't want it.
bettie: She's got her own.
-------
Soupytwist: It's like this whole Washington/Canada love. And everyone hates Portland.
-------
oslowe: That's like saying, "I'm a lucid alcoholic."
Soupytwist: Hey, I resemble that remark!
-------
All: [to Mr Soupy and oslowe] Thanks to the grill guys!
MdmeAlbertine: Thanks for being good for something!
-------
starshine: [To Cassy] Do you have salt?
oslowe: Do we look like Mormons to you?
-------
Mr Soupy: Your mom's totally Manchester!
-------
*Talking about regional accents*
CosmicAvatar: [in her worst Geordie] Eh, fancy a quick knee-trembler in them bushes, pet?
Caz: Come again?
CosmicAvatar: Yeah, you will!
-------
*On mayhem's first party*
starshine: I think he knew it was going to be OK once he realized we weren't going to mutilate him.
-------
*Having pretended to be going earlier, BigEvil is now saying goodbye for real*
CosmicAvatar: [hugging BigEvil] You'd better not be faking it this time.
BigEvil: [in monotone] Oh, baby, you were the best.
Bally: I get the feeling you've used this line before.
-------
*During OMWF*
MdmeAlbertine: We're so good!
*pause*
MdmeAlbertine: Or I'm so drunk!
-------
*The Ring of Fire is being played*
D, starshine's cousin: I have never ever... done the nasty in the back of a car.
*some people drink*
Soupytwist: Well, I've only ever done it in the front.
-------
kirielle: Ten!
CosmicAvatar: Never ever.
kirielle: Oh, God.
starshine: He's not here right now.
-------
CosmicAvatar: [to tinkcat] Quick, post before you pass out!
tinkcat: I'm reading! You are drunk, bitches!
-------
tinkcat: [before posting] My signature doesn't have vomit in it, does it?
-------
tinkcat: Why does my pants leg smell like rum and Coke?
-------
*tinkcat is heading for the toilet*
Bally: Gangway!
Caz: Eh?
Bally: I said, "Gangway."
Caz: I'll give you, "Gangway," Mr Ball!
Bally: is what what the young kids are calling it these days?
-------
tinkcat: [on seeing the quotebook] Why is this in front of me? I can't write anything!
-------
MdmeAlbertine: Ten!
CosmicAvatar: [sighing] Never ever.
MdmeAlbertine: I have never ever snogged a stranger.
mouse: Been there, done that, got the T-shirt, wore it out.
-------
*A queen has just been drawn*
CosmicAvatar: Continuous fucking drinking.
kirielle: Continuous fucking?!
Bally: [To Mr Soupy] Things are going to get interesting very soon.
tinkcat: Given the male to female ratio, we are going to kill these two guys.
Bally: Hey, I have stamina.
-------
*tinkcat picks the fourth king*
mouse: You should make her do two things, like you did me.
tinkcat: Hey, I'll do things, baby!
-------
*CosmicAvatar is posting under mouse's username*
mouse: I think they're going to know it's not me, because that word doesn't mean that here!
-------
starshine: I have never ever... slept with my evil twin.
tinkcat: I slept with a guy who had my name; does that count?
-------
CosmicAvatar: Someone else drunk-post!
mouse: Did you post as me? Did you do more than the goat?
-------
tinkcat: I think pyjamas would help me.
-------
mouse: Someone needs to make my bed for me - I'm too tired from the goat.
-------
oslowe: [on Sam] We're trying to keep his attention away from his mom. She's out having a fag.
mouse: That means something different here!
-------
Bally: [on Caz's knitting of a tiny sweater] That's never going to fit you.
bettie: She's dieting.
Bally: Good follow-up.
oslowe: That's what we keep her around for.
-------
tinkcat: Y'all are boring when I'm not drunk.
-------
tinkcat: OK, it would have been nice if someone had told me my fly's been undone all morning.
Caz: It's OK, I was staring at your chest.
-------
tinkcat: It's like air-conditioning in my pants!
-------
*CassyLee is asked to check if there are burgers in the freezer*
CosmicAvatar: But you've only just sat down!
CassyLee: This is in my self-interest, though.
-------
bettie: I took the tweezers and I wasn't shocked, but when I touched them to my Dad, he was.
*pause*
bettie: I was, like, three-and-a-half.
oslowe: She was fourteen.
-------
oslowe: [to CosmicAvatar] What you gotta do is cut the Twinkie in half and put a hot dog in it.
-------
tinkcat: [on Toy Story 2] So, how often have you seen this film?
oslowe: Oh, God. We quote lines of dialogue while we're fucking.
-------
bettie: We have only had sex once!
-------
oslowe: Do I have enough time for another beer before I take Sam to the park?
tinkcat: You are such a good Dad!
oslowe: I like to smell good for the other parents.
-------
CosmicAvatar: Did you know, I've been needing a pee for an hour and just sitting here?
CassyLee: Well, you don't need a piss card now.
-------
*On returning to house having left adjoining garage door open*
CosmicAvatar: OK, let's see how many people have broken in and killed everybody.
CassyLee: Boy, will my face be red.
Bally: If everyone else's face is red.
-------
oslowe: Hey, Simon, d'you want to come outside and grunt with me?
-------
bettie: I once made a margarita in a friend's mouth but that's less of a game, more of a skill.
-------
*Sam has locked Bally outside*
tinkcat: And don't come in until you've made our dinner!
-------
*We are looking at evidence of the night before in mouse's photo album*
Caz: Oh, Jesus!
mouse: I got him? That's got to be worth money!
-------
Bally: Three hundred miles? That's the length of our island!
bettie: That's the length of Rhode Island!
-------
bettie: When the four of us go out, people assume Will and Cassy are together.
oslowe: Doesn't help that we're making out all the time.
-------
tinkcat: Hey, it's a WD party. Someone was always going to get naked.
-------
mouse: [on hearing her son swear] "Not 'ho'! That's a horrible word. It's 'whore'!"
-------
mouse: I have twenty-seven chins. [Indicates chest] Some of them are down here.
-------
*We are looking at a photo of tinkcat*
Callie: See, no chins because it stops at your nose.
tinkcat: Oh, I like that! It makes me look like I'm eating Cindy, but it's good.
-------
*Sam is leaving*
CassyLee: That's how everyone reacts when they're forced to leave my place.
-------
Caz: Bye, Will!
oslowe: Bye, other wife!
-------
tinkcat: [to mouse] If you take a photo of my ass, I'll kill you.
-------
*A Sprint phone ad is on showing future scenes of Heroes*
Bally: I don't have a Sprint phone.
CassyLee: Then you're shit out of luck.
Tannoy announcer: Please stay off the lifeguard tower!
Caz: Is he talking to the seagull?
-------
[We're discussing the identity of the mystery guest due to arrive at Cassy's party]
Mr Soupy: What if it's a Republican?
BigEvil: As long as I can take him, it doesn't matter.
-------
oslowe: I heard the other day that Jason Vorhees is basically a giant cock-blocker.
-------
Soupytwist: [on being asked what's in her drink] About four different kinds of alcohol and milk. It tastes like candy!
-------
*oslowe is trying to explain a character in Naruto and not getting much back*
Mr Soupy: [apologetically] I'm sorry, I was thinking about math.
-------
*We're talking about films*
Mr Soupy: [to Soupytwist] What was the unwatchable crap you watched last night?
-------
MdmeAlbertine: Chinese Democracy [The Guns N Roses album] is like Bigfoot.
-------
*On the joy of siblings*
oslowe: One time when I was four and my sister was one, my mom was crying and I said to her, "Couldn't we just put her in the trash can?"
-------
CassyLee: Sammy, please may I have a potato chip?
*Sam passes one over*
CassyLee: See, I don't mind training a two-year-old to be my waiter.
-------
BigEvil: [noticing Sam] He has no pants.
mouse: I often get that problem myself.
-------
*We're discussing mouse's son's unusually large feet*
mouse: I told him he was going to have a lucky wife someday, but that was when he was taking the trash out.
-------
mouse: [on what her son said to her before they went to DragonCon] "And what are we not going to say to Alan Tudyk when we meet him? That you want his seed."
-------
BigEvil: I'm smelling of patchouli as we speak.
bettie: Fucking hippy. Or lesbian. I'm not quite sure.
-------
*We're talking about food and bettie is correcting BigEvil regarding ingredients in tahini*
Mr Soupy: We need a new website based on that conversation. "Ask Annika."
BigEvil: Iknowbetterthanyou.com.
-------
Mr Soupy: [after waiting for Sam to sit up so he can give him a drink] You can't get drunk laying down!
-------
*BigEvil has been sharing his drink around*
BigEvil: Last time I checked my cooties count was really low.
Callie: And you tell us after we drink?
-------
*bettie is showing Caz how to block in knitting*
BigEvil: How do you feel about blocking? If it's cock, I don't like it.
-------
*BigEvil has been relating how his normal dress gained the envy of a whole load of guys in pirate fancy dress*
BigEvil: I'm not a pirate!
Caz: No, you arrrrrrrrr!
-------
*MdmeAlbertine has just raced across the carpet after Sam on her hands and knees*
BigEvil: I haven't seen anyone move that fast on all fours for a while.
-------
*BigEvil is talking about how only the pretty people are in the circle created by CassyLee's house*
bettie: Where are the ugly people?
BigEvil: In that mythical world on the other side of the balcony.
mouse: Arkansas?
-------
MenleyNin: I write about poo way more than anyone without a child should.
bettie: I don't write about poo and I change diapers on a daily basis!
-------
Soupytwist: I'm really sad that I haven't met Simon yet.
CosmicAvatar and Caz: [simultaneously] Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!
(Heehee, little did we all know!)
-------
mouse: Y'see, now I'm picturing Alan Tudyk. You shouldn't do that.
-------
oslowe: Dude, you're too big for me.
BigEvil: You have the quickness advantage.
CosmicAvatar: I came in late to this conversation, didn't I?
-------
*We are looking over CassyLee's power ballad CD*
Mr Soupy: Whitesnake makes you think of "Great White".
BigEvil: It actually makes me think of hot chicks on cars.
-------
bettie: Those were pretty much all the bands I was listening to while in labour.
BigEvil: Willingly?
-------
mouse: I have to have this Advil ring for allergies.
BigEvil: I have one of those for when I go to nightclubs. "Advil only".
Mr Soupy: Advil and a pink cup.
-------
bettie: Where's Cassy? Drunk and passed out?
-------
Soupytwist: [On Mr Soupy] He can sew so well it's not funny.
BigEvil: I'll just stick to playing guitar really crappily.
Mr Soupy: Oh, I can do that too.
-------
*On the fact that Alyson Hannigan's pregnant*
bettie: Willow's having Wesley's baby!
All: EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!
BigEvil: Oh, yeah, this is a Buffy party!
-------
Caz: [on being mistaken for Sam's mother] Do you think my arse is that fat? Do you think I've had kids?
bettie: Hey!
-------
mouse: Well, you see a man and a woman playing with a child, you're bound to jump to conclusions.
Mr Soupy: [sotto voce to Caz] Also, Americans are stupid.
-------
Soupytwist: I'm built for farming and breeding.
-------
*starshine is talking to Sam while the latter is being breast-fed*
bettie: He's saying, "That's nice. This is my boob."
starshine: That's OK, honey, I don't want it.
bettie: She's got her own.
-------
Soupytwist: It's like this whole Washington/Canada love. And everyone hates Portland.
-------
oslowe: That's like saying, "I'm a lucid alcoholic."
Soupytwist: Hey, I resemble that remark!
-------
All: [to Mr Soupy and oslowe] Thanks to the grill guys!
MdmeAlbertine: Thanks for being good for something!
-------
starshine: [To Cassy] Do you have salt?
oslowe: Do we look like Mormons to you?
-------
Mr Soupy: Your mom's totally Manchester!
-------
*Talking about regional accents*
CosmicAvatar: [in her worst Geordie] Eh, fancy a quick knee-trembler in them bushes, pet?
Caz: Come again?
CosmicAvatar: Yeah, you will!
-------
*On mayhem's first party*
starshine: I think he knew it was going to be OK once he realized we weren't going to mutilate him.
-------
*Having pretended to be going earlier, BigEvil is now saying goodbye for real*
CosmicAvatar: [hugging BigEvil] You'd better not be faking it this time.
BigEvil: [in monotone] Oh, baby, you were the best.
Bally: I get the feeling you've used this line before.
-------
*During OMWF*
MdmeAlbertine: We're so good!
*pause*
MdmeAlbertine: Or I'm so drunk!
-------
*The Ring of Fire is being played*
D, starshine's cousin: I have never ever... done the nasty in the back of a car.
*some people drink*
Soupytwist: Well, I've only ever done it in the front.
-------
kirielle: Ten!
CosmicAvatar: Never ever.
kirielle: Oh, God.
starshine: He's not here right now.
-------
CosmicAvatar: [to tinkcat] Quick, post before you pass out!
tinkcat: I'm reading! You are drunk, bitches!
-------
tinkcat: [before posting] My signature doesn't have vomit in it, does it?
-------
tinkcat: Why does my pants leg smell like rum and Coke?
-------
*tinkcat is heading for the toilet*
Bally: Gangway!
Caz: Eh?
Bally: I said, "Gangway."
Caz: I'll give you, "Gangway," Mr Ball!
Bally: is what what the young kids are calling it these days?
-------
tinkcat: [on seeing the quotebook] Why is this in front of me? I can't write anything!
-------
MdmeAlbertine: Ten!
CosmicAvatar: [sighing] Never ever.
MdmeAlbertine: I have never ever snogged a stranger.
mouse: Been there, done that, got the T-shirt, wore it out.
-------
*A queen has just been drawn*
CosmicAvatar: Continuous fucking drinking.
kirielle: Continuous fucking?!
Bally: [To Mr Soupy] Things are going to get interesting very soon.
tinkcat: Given the male to female ratio, we are going to kill these two guys.
Bally: Hey, I have stamina.
-------
*tinkcat picks the fourth king*
mouse: You should make her do two things, like you did me.
tinkcat: Hey, I'll do things, baby!
-------
*CosmicAvatar is posting under mouse's username*
mouse: I think they're going to know it's not me, because that word doesn't mean that here!
-------
starshine: I have never ever... slept with my evil twin.
tinkcat: I slept with a guy who had my name; does that count?
-------
CosmicAvatar: Someone else drunk-post!
mouse: Did you post as me? Did you do more than the goat?
-------
tinkcat: I think pyjamas would help me.
-------
mouse: Someone needs to make my bed for me - I'm too tired from the goat.
-------
oslowe: [on Sam] We're trying to keep his attention away from his mom. She's out having a fag.
mouse: That means something different here!
-------
Bally: [on Caz's knitting of a tiny sweater] That's never going to fit you.
bettie: She's dieting.
Bally: Good follow-up.
oslowe: That's what we keep her around for.
-------
tinkcat: Y'all are boring when I'm not drunk.
-------
tinkcat: OK, it would have been nice if someone had told me my fly's been undone all morning.
Caz: It's OK, I was staring at your chest.
-------
tinkcat: It's like air-conditioning in my pants!
-------
*CassyLee is asked to check if there are burgers in the freezer*
CosmicAvatar: But you've only just sat down!
CassyLee: This is in my self-interest, though.
-------
bettie: I took the tweezers and I wasn't shocked, but when I touched them to my Dad, he was.
*pause*
bettie: I was, like, three-and-a-half.
oslowe: She was fourteen.
-------
oslowe: [to CosmicAvatar] What you gotta do is cut the Twinkie in half and put a hot dog in it.
-------
tinkcat: [on Toy Story 2] So, how often have you seen this film?
oslowe: Oh, God. We quote lines of dialogue while we're fucking.
-------
bettie: We have only had sex once!
-------
oslowe: Do I have enough time for another beer before I take Sam to the park?
tinkcat: You are such a good Dad!
oslowe: I like to smell good for the other parents.
-------
CosmicAvatar: Did you know, I've been needing a pee for an hour and just sitting here?
CassyLee: Well, you don't need a piss card now.
-------
*On returning to house having left adjoining garage door open*
CosmicAvatar: OK, let's see how many people have broken in and killed everybody.
CassyLee: Boy, will my face be red.
Bally: If everyone else's face is red.
-------
oslowe: Hey, Simon, d'you want to come outside and grunt with me?
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bettie: I once made a margarita in a friend's mouth but that's less of a game, more of a skill.
-------
*Sam has locked Bally outside*
tinkcat: And don't come in until you've made our dinner!
-------
*We are looking at evidence of the night before in mouse's photo album*
Caz: Oh, Jesus!
mouse: I got him? That's got to be worth money!
-------
Bally: Three hundred miles? That's the length of our island!
bettie: That's the length of Rhode Island!
-------
bettie: When the four of us go out, people assume Will and Cassy are together.
oslowe: Doesn't help that we're making out all the time.
-------
tinkcat: Hey, it's a WD party. Someone was always going to get naked.
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mouse: [on hearing her son swear] "Not 'ho'! That's a horrible word. It's 'whore'!"
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mouse: I have twenty-seven chins. [Indicates chest] Some of them are down here.
-------
*We are looking at a photo of tinkcat*
Callie: See, no chins because it stops at your nose.
tinkcat: Oh, I like that! It makes me look like I'm eating Cindy, but it's good.
-------
*Sam is leaving*
CassyLee: That's how everyone reacts when they're forced to leave my place.
-------
Caz: Bye, Will!
oslowe: Bye, other wife!
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tinkcat: [to mouse] If you take a photo of my ass, I'll kill you.
-------
*A Sprint phone ad is on showing future scenes of Heroes*
Bally: I don't have a Sprint phone.
CassyLee: Then you're shit out of luck.
